150 Signs You're Addicted to Stargate: Atlantis
by DarthBetty
Summary: So funny....Trust me. Please feel free to add more reasons in reviews or messages. I'll try and add them. Please write down your favorite ones so I can get an idea of how much your addicted.
1. 1 to 50 Signs

1. You praise the ancestors when something finally goes your way.

2. You experince hallucinations of a certain John Sheppard when bored in the library. (or any other member of the Atlantis Team)

3. You want to learn how to fight with sticks.

4. When you find yourself stuck doing science homework you ask yourself "What would McKay do?"

5. You want to have dreds just so you can stick as many knives as possible in your hair.

6. You've thought about archiving all of John's facial expressions.

7. You hate those damn bugs.

8. You've tried fighting in a skirt just because Teyla can.

9. You thought of a hundred ways to test out Rodney's super shield.

10. You call strange scary people Bob or Steve.

11. You mumble like an Asgaurd when you're pissed off.

12. You can count John's offworld conquests.

13. You threaten people with lemons.

14. You regularly contemplate the perfectness of John's hair.

15. You make long lists about being addicted to stargate atlantis when you should be trying to pass your exams.

16. Being as sarcastic as Sheppard

17. Watching the DVDs all day instead of working

18. Spending hours on youtube watching Atlantis fan vids.

19. Spending hours trying to figure out how to special order or make Ronon's gun.

20. Even though you own the DVDs you watch it every time it is on TV because you just can't get enough.

21. Making "Men of Atlantis" wallpapers

22. Making "Men of Atlantis" screensavers

23. Understanding these jokes.

24. Laughing at them.

25. When you continually quote lines from the show into everyday life and constantly confuse everyone else.

26. You actually think McKay is quiet charming.

27. Watching all of the episode commentaries

28. Watching all of the extras on the DVDs

29. Being able to identify with the Wraith and getting the joke "It's not easy being green"

30. Getting so caught up in the episodes that you threaten to send bombs to the writers of Stargate if they don't bring Carson back.

31. You cried when Carson Beckett Died.

Or...

32. You didn't actually believe that Carson died and after the episode was over. So you started fuming for about 15 minutes about how Stargate can't confuse you like that. Then, you ultimately come to the realization that he is gone when you do research on the internet. You cry when you see Carson in other episodes. (This happened to me)

33. You hate Kavanaghas much as everyone else does and you secretly hope he gets murdered horrible and they have a party.

34. You get jealous whenever any of the Atlantis crew finds a possible romantic relationship.

35. You think Teyla is absolutely adorable.

36. You are ridiculously attracted to any of the cast on Atlantis and write fan fiction about them. (You guys..lol)

37. You wish you could steal some of McKay's coffee.

38. You wish you could play a game of chess with Dr. Z just so he could beat you.

39. You really want to brush Dr. Z's hair.

40. You really want to figure out if Miko from Letters From Pegasus is the famous Dr. Kusanagi.

41. You go around touching things carefully in your house or in other places hoping they will light up and you find out that your part ancient.

42. You have a sudden urge to go to Antarctica…really bad.

43. You watch for Teyla saying "don't" instead of her usual "do not". One day she'll mess up. You just wait….

44. Every episode you hope that your imagined little mini character waltz on the show and fulfills your fantasies.

45. You proudly now know what a 'Hail Mary' is.

46. You like Johnny Cash just because Shepherd has a poster in his room.

47. You either really like Simon or don't like him at all. You either wish Weir would go back to him and leave all the other Atlantis men alone or you think he's fat and old and doesn't deserve her.

48. You spend hours trying to translate Dr. Z. And you know that he's cursing his brains out.

49. Cadman doesn't deserve Carson. Just putting that out there.

50. You secretly fantasize about the wraith. You are so wrong. (We all do it at some point.)


	2. 51 to 100 Signs

(((Warning: Some of these jokes are references to Wraithal Discrimination: It's Not Easy Being Green on the bonus features for the first season. So, if you don't get it...don't worry about it. I'm sorry if a lot of these are about the Wraith and not the cast and what-not, but I just kept thinking about the bloody Wraith.)))

51. You have seriously considered joining Mensa.

52. You would like to see James Lafazanos without the Wraith makeup. (Thanks Beka.)

53. Nuclear bomb building looks simple now….

54. When you're outside, you duck your head and look at the skies for a Wraith Dart.

55. You swear up and down that your ancestors were Wraith/Ancients.

56. You have greeted some of your friends by putting your forehead on theirs.

57. You have _actually_…and I mean _actually _played Prime or Not Prime.

58. You've written words to the theme song.

59. You think you can speak Ancient.

60. You jump into swimming pools pretending they are Stargates.

61. You know what Paul McGillion sounds like without his Scottish accent.

62. Even though the Star Trek rule is 'the one is red always dies', Dr. Weir somehow has missed this. (Except in Season 4. That lady is gone, son!)

63. You're waiting for the episode where they stick McKay on a piano.

64. You've pondered why Michael looks different from the other Wraith who were turned into humans.

65. You've seriously considered dyeing your hair white. If that's possible….

66. You look at your friends and decide who the gene inoculation would work on and who would be left out.

67. You hate the military because of how they treat scientists.

68. Sometimes you're convinced that you saw a shadow and Wraith are near by.

69. You can sense the Wraith's presence.

_Some added by Espiritu:_

_70. You expect your car to respond to your thoughts.  
71. You've become addicted to power bars.  
72. Snark is a way of life.  
73. Writing and reading far too many Shep whump stories.  
74. You call elevators transporters.  
75. When you dial the last digit in a phone number you think chevron 7 is locked._

_From Lanthir1:_

_76. You spend time converting your friends to Stargate Atlantis  
77. Every new pet you get ends up being named after a Stargate Atlantis character.  
78. You have no social life on Friday nights outside of your house because you have to watch SGA.  
79. You know a toddler named Rodney and can't help but see McKay in him._

80. Gordon the Wraith is your favorite. And you're never too tired of seeing him appear and die over and over and over again.

81. Dude, the T1000 was on the Atlantis pilot. Agent Doggit….Sorry, I'm just being a nerd now.

82. You've googled Stargate: Atlantis like a billion times _and_ you've been to You want to join the Wraith bike riding gang.

84. Where does David Hewlett get those lollypops? Where?

85. You've incorporated words like 'bloody' and 'lads' into your vocabulary.

86. You make bets with yourself on who is going to screw up the next off world mission.

87. You have used IMDB to find just about everything else the Atlantis cast has worked on.

88. You've imagined the big Wraith with the masks getting confused and bumping into each other because they can't see.

89. You thought the Wraith were kinda hot when they turned into humans…(#50 again)

90. You have either seen or would really like to see A Dog's Breakfast. (It's a comedy that David Hewlett directed and it stars some of the people from Atlantis.)

91. In remembrance of Ford you've started badly naming things.

92. Nanites live in your brain…for some reason they haven't killed you yet.

93. You know what EMP stands for. (Really any nerd should know that)

94. You're blindly convinced that Carson is coming back…he is.

95. You've had debates on whether Sam Carter is smarter than Rodney McKay.

96. You try to turn the lights on in your house…mentally.

97. Stargate Atlantis has made you cry a lot more than you'd care to admit.

98. Sometimes you pretend that your car is cloaked and no one can see you.

99. You can quote some of the funniest lines from the show. Such classics as:

What am I MacGyver!?

Oh my God; he is Kirk!

We're in another Galaxy. How much more out can you get? (Please give me some more of these. I'd love to post a bunch of quotes)

100. No matter what happens in Season 4 and no matter what you hear over the internet, you will remain devoted to Stargate: Atlantis. tear I'm so proud of you.


	3. Notes

101. You forget which details you read in fanfics and which you saw on the TV show.

102. When you watch the show with other people, you realize that at some parts you laugh for entirely too long.

103. You have dreams about Dr. McKay or any of the other men/women on Atlantis.

104. You think being extremely sarcastic towards people should be a way of life now.

Sorry, guys my brain went dry. I started another one though that consists of Memorable Quotes from the Show. Please check that one out.


	4. 101 to 150

101. You forget which details you read in fan fics and which you saw on the TV show.

102. When you watch the show with other people, you realize that at some parts you laugh for entirely too long.

103. You have dreams about Dr. McKay or any of the other men/women on Atlantis.

104. You think being extremely sarcastic towards people should be a way of life now.

105. You become a football fan because Sheppard is one.

106. You occasionally watch Jeopardy since you saw 'The Long Goodbye'

107. You begin to crossover your favorite shows with SGA in your head even if it doesn't seem feasible. Any excuse to do so works just fine.

108. You refuse to back down in your belief that the Wraith are way cooler than the Borg any day.

109. You read Joe Mallozzi's blog everyday or anyone else for that matter. (David Nykl has one…oh, I'm such a nerd.)

110. You've been to a convention.

111. You're convinced that you need a Zed-P-M to power your car.

112. You freak out with joy when you see a Stargate actor on another TV show or in a movie.

113. You come up with a new cool race of people and you are the actor playing them in your head.

114. You buy episodes for your IPOD even though you already have all the episodes on DVD.

115. Your wardrobe consists of blue shirts and beige pants.

116. You treat your blackberry or phone like it's a life signs detector.

117. You will fight to the death in saying that the Wraith are way cooler than the Borg.

118. Humming the Stargate theme music in the shower, and nearly slipping and falling through the glass when you reach the crescendo. (Did that this morning)

119. You replace "yes" with "indeed" at **every** opportunity.

120. when you want to have your license plate (for your car) a planet's designation.

121. You deliberately schedule to meet up with friends on any other night than Friday evening because you would rather watch Stargate.

122. The only vacation you are planning this year is to a sci-fi convention.

123. You start working on your costume for said sci-fi convention four months in advance.

124. You know what episodes your favorite characters have major parts in or have their greatest moments in.

125. When you meet someone and they say they've never heard of star gate and you then feel that there is absolutely nothing you have in common with that person anymore.

126. You absolutely, positively have to watch every episode in the correct order or else you feel you've missed something.

OR

127. You're so addicted that you'll watch any episode that comes on because you've probably already researched everything on the internet even if you haven't seen the episode yet.

128. You are seriously considering getting a star gate-related tattoo.

129. You actually buy enough building supplies to build a FULL SCALE model of Atlantis(including the Stargate Operations area complete with the Ancient Database)

130. When you can name an episode just by hearing a tiny fragment of the plot. Or even a short noise from the episode.

131. When you call the star gate "beautiful".

132. You actually go out and buy 100 lbs of pure raw titanium, 200 ft of fiber optic cable, seven 100,000 watt industrial strength capacitors, and a toaster. You then try to build your own star gate.

133. You start wondering what it would be like to Ascend.

134. You don't go to sleep unless you have your air soft P90 on the nightstand and the safety off incase of the things that go "bump" in the night end up being an enemy.

135. Your dining room is referred to as the "Briefing Room" same goes for the kitchen only it is called the "Mess Hall" and the garage is called, "The Lab."

136. If someone wakes you up in the middle of the night/ for work/ or for school you automatically assume that someone has done something stupid and they need you to fix it.

137. You name your computers after the characters/references in the show. I've named mine Hot Zone. My friend named his Shepherd.

138. When someone says something incorrect about Stargate on the internet you go and research what he/she said and then joyfully correct them.

139. When someone says something incorrect in real life you do not hesitate to jump down their throat like a certain arrogant scientist.

140. You try and find times to say "blatantly obvious".

141. When you keep telling yourself, "I must get a life outside of Stargate. I must get a life outside of Stargate. I must get a life outside of Stargate."

142. When someone goes over your opinion as if it were inferior to their own or just makes you angry, you start yelling in what you think sounds like Czech.

143. You literally suffer withdrawal symptoms (headaches, crankiness) when you can't watch it.

144. You believe it would be possible for you to build your _own_ star gate, if only you could get a hold of some naquadah.

145. You know what the hell any of the scientists are talking about.

146. You know the exact dialing sequence to get to Atlantis.

147. You wonder who explained things like Tampons and other things to Teyla and how that conversation went. Lol.

148. You have passed being intimate with someone in order to watch and episode.

149. You think that Wraith Enzyme seems like a cool thing to try.

150. You believe the Stargate universe is real. And if this is the case I wouldn't be surprised if you thought that Earth's first contact will come from the Vulcans. Congrats to you if you got that one.

Sorry, guys my brain went dry. I started another one though that consists of Memorable Quotes from the Show. Please check that one out.

Number 84 is from the Wraithal Discrimination. Oh my goodness it's so funny. Gordon the Wraith asks the camera where David Hewlett keeps getting these lollypops that he has in his mouth.


	5. 151 to 200

151. You search the phone book for names of the Atlantis personnel.

152. You were able to correct your physics professor on quantum theory.

153. English is no longer your favorite subject because Astrophysics is suddenly so much more interesting.

154. You have pondered what Shepherd would do without his magic hair gel.

155. You get so into the episodes that when they are over you wonder where you have been for the last hour.

156. You just cannot stop thinking about Stargate: Atlantis.

157. You have taken a rock, painted it green, and taped it to your chest calling it a force generator.

158. You want Lucius's potion in _Irresistible_. Think of the possibilities.

159. You have officially chosen Atlantis over SG1. I know…it's a big step.

160. How in the hell do you win ENTER THE GATE SWEEPSTAKES!? (cries in corner)

161. You think rating the episodes is blasphemy to Stargate.

162. You started and have remained devoted to the show for only one character.

163. When you become visibly affected elsewhere because of what is happening on the show. i.e. Carson's death. I moped around the house for a week.

164. As a woman you have thought this: "Screw Dr. Kelly! She can piss off. Geez…she better not make eyes at any of my men."

165. For the longest time you wondered how the Wraith...uh…reproduce.

166. As a man you have thought this: "If only I could be a smart as McKay, have cool hair like Shepherd, and kick some ass like Ronan."

167. You suddenly find all men with accents very...appealing.

168. When you think that Canada is filled with fascinating people whom you have yet to meat but may in the near future.

169. You wish Dr. Beckett was you doctor. Why do our doctors have to be so ugly and…old?

170. You think you need a gate address to get to work/school.

171. You started drinking coffee because it help McKay to stay awake and in your sick mind you think that brings you closer together.

172. When you think that you are the only one that can understand any of the men on Atlantis. Therefore you are the only one who deserves them.

173. You giggle like an idiot whenever Dr. Z takes his glasses off.

174. You're even jealous of the people who work on the Atlantis set.

175. I need to go watch some Atlantis…my fix needs to be satisfied…

176. You wish there was more episodes devoted to back stories.

178. You pick up on all the smallest comments about the characters in the series, anything that reveals a little about their character or what their life was like on earth.

179. Though this goes against what I said earlier (#34), you like Kavanagh for some damn reason. Maybe just because he's on Stargate: Atlantis.

180. When you think Weir looks like a fish. She does! and she's so freaking boring.

181. When you realize that Shepherd really is Kirk. Of course this just makes you a big nerd.

182. You know it's dangerous to sleep with knives, but if Ronan does it…

183. You wonder why your weren't invited to women's poker night on Atlantis.

184. You have thought of multiple ways to confuse Teyla and Ronan with pop culture references.

185. You have also thought of multiple ways of scaring the Athosian children since Shepherd couldn't.

186. You have a Hermoid-like doll.

187. You've had an argument with someone about the correct spelling of naquadah/ naquada/ naqada. Whatever!

188. You edit Stargate Wiki pages.

189. You think Janus should be with Dr. Weir. He was adorable!

190. You claim that nobody else but you can use your laptop/PC because only you have the Ancient (or ATA) Gene needed to activate it.

191. You watch the most horrific and terrible movies just because a Stargate actor is in it even if only for about 2 minutes.

192. You refer to batteries as Zed PM's, ZPM's, or Zero-Point Modules.

193. You refuse open your front door unless the person ringing the doorbell can send in an IDC code.

194. You write letters to MGM and the Sci-Fi channel about how mad you are they killed Bob and Steve, the Wraiths.

195. You keep thinking that Shepherd's team is going to show up wandering around in your woods, looking for a Zed-P-M.

196. After watching an episode, you act it out only to include yourself.

197. You spend hours working on this damn list of obsessions.

198. You think up first names for Major Lorne.

199. Every time your computer crashes, or you have a power failure, you blame it on the Replicators.

200. You love Stargate: Atlantis so much you feel you going to explode with excitement when thinking about it.

For any of these you have questions about, got to or just message me with the questions.

A few of these were taken from another list on the internet. But only a few .


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